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Out At Sea

by Alan Scardapane

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1.
Sideways 05:16
Wishing sideways you were born But you’re right side up And man, that’s tough When you’ve spent every penny wishing That there’d be nothing left but living to do Watching freight cars in the haze Cause you can’t go home Left town long ago And now you live up by the city Man, it must be a pity to be you Smoking Camels in the cold Itching for a Marlboro And maybe you’ll be fine, you know? But it’s no wonder she was taken Don’t be mistaken, you had waited too long To tell her why she should stay And fix the live you’d made Yeah, fix the life she gave To you Punching windows ‘til you bleed And they don’t talk back Yeah, they just spit out facts About Chevy Monte Carlos And where the sunken river still flows Reading books from right to left Dylan Thomas is dead And yet it still makes sense That every time you turn a page That rage you feel inside you is engaged Mirror, mirror on the wall Why can’t I have it all Why must I be so small When every single lucid vision I have Just turns into another reason to call
2.
Yesterday 04:01
Yesterday, I was blind in a hole Yesterday, I was shining in gold Then the wind blew, I was drunk and on my own In the rearview, was the writing on my tomb Four more steps, ‘til I fall off the ledge One more debt, ‘til I kiss my brother dead Free falling, on a ship without a name I’ve been drinking, but in the end its all the same Feed me, with the temper of your breath Need me, let my body be your vest Feel the rhythm, of my whispers in your bones Lord have mercy, who needs god when I’ve got you doll This is my story, and it’s something I can’t trace And though I’m lonely, what keeps me going is your face I’m ashamed love, of the shit I put you through But I’m here to promise, in time I’ll make it up to you
3.
Out At Sea 05:47
I once dreamt that I lived out at sea Watching waves crash on rocks Filled my belly with seaweed Counted stars from the docks The blue water, she rippled So effortless, so sweet The abyss was my kingdom Never looked down at my feed I once dreamt I had taken a lover She was bursting with sin She challenged my wisdom She could curse with a grin I was teeming with envy Yet I never saw her face When she handed me whiskey I had lost all my taste I now dream that I live in a memory Shaping clay with my elbows, not hands And I can be happy With just a bucket of sand In the heat of the dead of the winter, In the shoes of a ghost in a cloak I gave speeches to men in tall buildings Then I realized, I never spoke
4.
Just cause we dream when we’re asleep Doesn’t mean we’re not aware Just cause a soldier holds a gum, Doesn’t mean he isn’t scared Fuel is fire without the flame Yet somehow still it finds a home And as the jester starts his dance The king still finds himself alone My condolences to death Our aspirations ran aground Thought you were free when you were lost Now face the horror once you’re found
5.
I’ve been walking down that long, lonesome road I’ve been walking down that long, lonesome road It’s the very same one from that sixties Dylan song I’ve been walking down that long, lonesome road I’ve been kicking up the gravel with my boots The moon she’s shining bright, keeping the truth That our days are dead and gone, somehow our bodies linger on I’ve been kicking up the gravel with my boots My momma says that good things come to those who wait But I’d rather drink a pint and tempt my fate See, I was born a dead man’s son, lord knows I like to have my fun Momma says that good things come to those who wait Now the Devil’s got a noose around my neck And he’s trying awfully hard to do his best But he’s screaming at his son, who took the safety off the gun The Devil’s got a noose around my neck So I whispered in his ear, “boy, let me free” He said, “son, you know that choice ain’t up to me” “Shoulda fixed your momma’s car, but you were sitting at the bar” I whispered in his ear “boy, let me free” I’ve been walking down that long, lonesome road And this guitar, she just keeps cracking in the cold So if that means that I can’t play, you’ll have to bury me today I’ve been walking down that long, lonesome road
6.
Meaghan 05:16
Meaghan, running down the pavement Feeding birds in cages, in the third grade But now I haven’t heard your name in ages Been through so many stages of health and misery Meaghan, though you’d be courageous But now you’re in the back pages, with the OB’s So why’d you choose, the hole and bruise Over a breath, that was yours to lose Blaming, cursing the heavens for their taking of sons and daughters Now they’re breaking, choosing a casket and a grave Mother and father, should they even really bother Making amends with one another if their child can’t be saved So why’d you choose, the hole and bruise Over a breath, that was yours to lose Meaghan, where was your head, what were you thinking When you were sinking towards the bats and the bees Now your brother has no guardian to cover he and his cursed lover But you’ll be waiting at the gates So why’d you choose, the hole and bruise Over a breath, that was yours to lose
7.
Jacki 05:44
I miss you, and I wish you were here I spend my days now, pretending I’m not scared But the truth is, every second that goes by Without hearing your voice, is like a dagger in my side And that’s how I know, that this is worth the wait Cause this love that I feel, there’s no movie they can make Jacki my baby, you’re the one I sit at a desk for most of my day Moving other peoples’ money to make sure I get paid And I hate every day that I sold my soul But I don’t give a damn, knowing one day you’ll be there when I come home You are the only thing that matters You are the only thing that breathes Just one look in your eyes and I’m shattered Lay my head on your chest and I can fall asleep
8.
1955 (intro) 01:48
9.
1955 05:40
Watching our days pass us by Tripping on cloud fields, swimming in the sky What’ll it take until we wonder why The ground below is burning, our children left to die The land of the free, but nowhere’s safe The black man and his family spend every minute chased By his neighbors who claim that they don’t see race Policeman gets a call and puts a bullet in his face Here’s to our brothers practicing Islam And the courage you show every day by just keeping on If it becomes illegal we’ll say FUCK the law The Christians are the ones who killed for far too long Our children go to war and they don’t come back And even if they do, we seem to leave them in the past Let’s not forget our president, who dodged the draft He was too busy with his daddy breaking black folks’ backs Why do god fearing white men have so much to say Mike Pence wants to hang you if you’re not straight And to make sure women can’t control their own bodies Welcome to 1955, god bless the USA All the good little children, pledge allegiance to the flag Women can’t get through the day without being attacked And told that it happened because of the way they act And if they don’t keep silent, they’re a liar and a tramp Amendment two is sacred, so we must obey Who needs mental healthcare when you can just play With all the guns you want, and at the end of the day They’ll say you shot the kids because you were crazy
10.
My, my, where’d you go Off to a place that I don’t know Out in the garden, they’re trading blows A piece of us was buried beneath your mother’s bones Bloody Mary, you’re much too late The weeping willow by our front door has sealed its fate I’ll pretend that I’m doing great A beggar’s words, as good as gold, for what’s at stake I’ve been trying to stay awake Ripping and roaring, we’ll never be the same I’ve been trying to come back home I want to come home I want to come home Trading lies was a mistake Foolish figures surround us now, there’s no mistake I have done what I can to break The mold that makes us realize our sheepish ways I’ve been dying, furious and stoned Creeping and crawling, on a murderer’s row I’ve been dying to come back home I want to come home I want to come home This is not our front door
11.
Like Waves 03:11
Look up my love Be mindful, of what you touch This night is on the run And I’m not sure what’s begun But you’re so damn beautiful I’m all eyes and ears Set aside your deepest, darkest fears Forget about your mother’s tears In a moment, we’ll disappear And you’re so damn beautiful I just can’t wait Yet your echoes are growing faint Take a deep breath, and feel the weight As our bodies crash down like waves You’re so damn beautiful

about

"Out at Sea" is Alan Scardapane's first full length album. The album captures an assortment of songs written by the artist between 2014-2018 as he moved around the Northeastern United States. It is also the first full length album released by Robot Records.

www.alanscardapane.com

credits

released August 10, 2018

Alan Scardapane - Guitar, Vocals, Harmonica, Banjo (Track 9)
Corey Beauregard - Guitar (Tracks 2, 3, 4, and 7), Mandolin, Banjo (Track 5)
Nick Parisi - Keyboards
Devin Fernberg - Bass
Jon Sanders - Drums, Percussion, Bass (Track 6)

All songs written by Alan Scardapane
Recorded mostly by Jon Sanders at Robot Records, llc, N Attleboro, MA, USA. Some recording done in Alan's bedroom
Mixed by Jon Sanders at Robot Records, llc, N Attleboro, MA, USA
Produced by Alan Scardapane and Jon Sanders
Mastered by Scott Craggs at Old Colony Mastering
Artwork by Riley Wynn

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Alan Scardapane Boston, Massachusetts

Singer-Songwriter Alan Scardapane is forever pursuing the idea of "home." His lyrically driven songs grapple most often with self identity and
the vulnerability of honest introspection. Scardapane's primary influences include Nick Drake, Gregory Alan Isakov, Neil Young, Noah Gundersen and many more. His debut Full Length album, "Out at Sea", hit the shelves on Friday, August 10th.
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